Intermission (As a Grad)

Don't worry. I'm going to be back soon. Within the week in fact. There's something I need to show you first; it actually has nothing to do with the next post which will not be pokémon (sorry). It's just something, I rather like and find...interesting.

Was it me?

Foxy I really hope so. Seriously, check out those chompers. Frontal lobe, no problem. See you soon audience!

P.S. The next post will be on the hero of the downtrodden and bacon.

Game of Life

This was written on many cups of tea/coffee/some sort of smoothie mixture/Pepsi/water/tea/café/latte/more tea

Fuck sleep. I have not been able to work on this blog in far too long and it's driving me insane. Audience I am not waist deep in snarling emotional stress that causes me to only sleep and work and not eat; I promise you that is not the situation. I mean I have stresses but life wouldn't be worthwhile without the daily nags of "to do". No, I just have been floating along and unable to stop for a while and write this blog. And though this doesn't count as a video game (dismiss the computer version of the board game), I feel like writing about the Game of Life. Why? It's the one game we can't ever win yet must always play. Also I don't think you want a scope of what I've been playing recently, seriously you'll die of boredom.

So the low down is as follows:

• I have not stopped playing video games
• I have not been able to play post worthy games due to focus on other activities
• I've played been playing ONLY played Animal Crossing (Xanax)
• Each day I have to read and reread various topics since my classes are all unique (time)
• My work area is clean (time)
• Cooking is what I do for every meal (health nut)
• Tea and hot bathes are how I relax every day (spa nut)
• My schedule is not flexible (control freak)
• Sailing is important to me (summer time)
• French Club is important to me (nostalgia and food)
• Chess is important to me (war)
• Social Media is on hold (waste of time)
• PREPARING FOR MY FREAKIN' FUTURE 

Audience as you probably don't know, I am going to graduate this December. That's right, soon to not being a college student. It's a sweet deal and I am looking forward to not living in a town where everyone on the social spectrum is younger than me except for grad students. Plus, I'm in Iowa. I can only take so much of being in the middle of nowhere for so long. I have plans, they are malleable, but that doesn't prevent the pain in the ass of it all. Let's start with two itchy levels, very itchy and uncomfortable levels. Wish I could skip the cut-scenes.

Level One: Pretending to care about a job during an interview

I have no idea what I am actually going to be doing as a long term career. I like it that way because it will be a surprise.

Beautiful

There's this funny feeling in my gut that I'll say screw it all in a few years and take night labs in order to become a cryogenicist in order to have a private supply of liquid helium and have reason to visit Antarctica on business. However, for the time being I am simply applying for basic business jobs. Why? Well urban areas tend to require business experience. I have other professional skills and experiences I can bring to the table but the basics are great to have covered. I just don't care. Least not really. I'll do a good job since it's work. However I'm only in it for experience, not for long term investment. 

Level Two: Pestering my Mentors

During my college years I have gathered a small pool of mentors. There are namely two professors who know me well and can provide substantial information regarding my work. Nagging is not something I enjoy and yet I must in order to receive letters of recommendation. To the rest of the world this is not bothersome. To me it is. Asking for praise is so, low. Even for professional purposes it just feels "foreign" to me. Kind of like a mystery stew where you're not sure what is flavoring it but you know it's artificial in every way.

Quick Tip: Remember to remind your professors that all letters have to be in English. Though Canadian companies (governmental ones) wouldn't care, American companies aren't big on translating French.

Moving on from levels. 

The next step of life is realizing what you actually do know about your future. This is where people become afraid. Everyone doesn't know everything for certain about what is to come but everyone knows something.

Are you a Dilbert or a Dogbert?

If you know what job you want and how to achieve that position, congratulations you're a workaholic. Seriously you are. If the job is all that matters and all that you have figured out on your master plan, well that's all you'll have for a long time. The job will be your happiness. You'll have to mold yourself to all other surroundings. Eventually you'll have more but not right away. 

See the job, I'll find it in the long run. And I mean THE job. The one I love and hate because I'm passionate about it. That job. Not a job, but THE job. That will come later as all good things should. What will come before (which incidentally is a "later" because of having to wait until now) is the place, the wings. It's all about finding your roads so that you'll have a sense of which way to go.

So DEEP. Really. Really. Deep.

Between the flowery lines of what I'm saying is a simple message; if you have a place you love, go to it and don't let go. I want to love where I am. If home is the apartment, the city, the sidewalks, the night lights, the flood of footsteps, the hush of winter, the ticket stubs, the cafés, well I'll be happy. I have a home in mind and am not going to stop til I am there. That place, that's what I know about my future. To me, the place is where to start if you have that option. If you only love the job and not your home, that's not a very friendly life. If you're in a technical field, like I said workaholic.

Now let's hop off that train and hit another big brick of Mary's life philosophy. It's time for purpose! Which is actually easy to answer. Your purpose is to live. How you live is your choice. This relates to the difference of job and place in your future; after the diploma if you focus on job then your purpose is to work well; if you focus on place then your purpose is to find a happy home. Of course there are millions of little grey strings attached that can tug you in many directions of personal purpose. Still you probably fall into one of those two categories (even if you want both you will focus on one primarily). So purpose shouldn't be terrifying because it's simply what happens everyday. Just fulfill it because tomorrow never arrives. 

List of Little Things #9. City Lights

Lastly on this wacky rant/regurgitation of information, what matters most in life. Another easy answer. You. Duh. It's your life so better make sure you enjoy it. That's not to say you should take the extreme and start murdering strangers and raping colleagues. No. That type of activity is something a mind that desperately needs medicine would do. Don't do those things or anything related of the sort. Instead do something you want to do. Such as moving to a new place. Trying that café you always pass by. Talking to someone whom you notice everyday yet have always stayed silent. Leaving a message for a soul who matters to you. Making yourself happy by treating yourself right. Allowing yourself to make mistakes. Enjoying the little things that always make you smile. If you don't now, then seriously when? 

The End

Life has no winners because death takes everyone. No matter what happened during your life you will die. Make your life worthwhile to you because you may not have a second chance. Don't dwell on mistakes and don't beat yourself to the ground. Accept limitations yet break boundaries. Go for it dude. Go out there and come close to winning by Playing the Game.

THE END (Seriously I'm freakin' tired yet now satisfied for writing this. Still tired)

You can see the lack of sleep from these past few nights haha!

Intermission

Audience I am so sorry for not writing to you in eons. I've been having an "Intermission", actually this more of "We're So Starving".

I have not been writing songs for you audience but rather doing research. I have a list of games (actually a few flops or games I suck at which will hopefully be humorous) for the summer which I will be writing/recording/entertaining you with. So do not fret, I have not forgotten you. I've just been working behind the scenes.

As promised I will be writing more on Skyrim. That will be the theme of the next blog post in fact. Ah but what type of character/quests will I be writing about? You'll just have to continue to be patient. Write to you soon!

Sorry

My dear dear DEAR Audience,

As you know this is me (hay-fever me)

This is me working on riveting homework

This is me crippled under guilt of having not written a blog in over a month

I am sorry for neglecting you. I'll definitely have something for you before May 2nd. PROMISE!

P.S. If I don't keep my promise, which won't happen cause I will, I sentence myself to drinking myself into a stupor via Jager and Captain Morgan on the night of May 2nd.

P.S.S. It will probably happen that night regardless ;P

Reasons why I write: Sadly not about a game

The LAN post I hinted about in my last blog will be put on hold for a short while. The problem is my dad took down the LAN setup my brother and I made together over the holidays. This is an issue since the LAN post includes pictures of what LANs look like which were/will be silly pictures of my friends and me. So until I can recreate the LAN setting which may take a few weekends the LAN post will be on the back burner.

Still, I wanted to write to you audience because that's something I do. Why? Well that's kinda the title of the post. At least reasons I can think of why I write and what I earn from it. Things may become a bit weirder than normal. You've been warned.

Number 1: To release emotion

I am an emotional person (in fact everyone is emotional just in different ways) who tends to show extreme bursts of emotion rather than small doses. My normal state is just relaxed, not really happy or sad just calm. Apparently this causes a bored look to appear on my face (source, my friends) which isn't exactly true to how I'm feeling; I mean I can feel boredom but when I'm inside my mind I tend to not be showing it on the outside, apparently. So when I do show emotion it tends to be on the more intense spectrum. This covers all my ranges such as anger, sadness, happiness, envy, anxiety, fear, etc. Whenever I feel any of these you will know. I'm not known for being subtle. Often this causes interesting reactions to the environment around me namely people. Obnoxious happy Mary is hyper and often optimistic and very liberal with hugs. On the flip-side depressed frail Mary literally slinks around the room until she finds a comfortable spot on the floor and remains still until sense knocks her in the head. Whatever the emotion, if I am alone or can be for some moments I will write. Sometimes this means writing furiously spilling ink all over the place, decorating my arms with colorful shades of marker, or typing with my eyes closed on Rikki. All of these emotions are useful for writing a story and if I'm feeling one of them strongly then I can write a scene or chapter far better than in my normal calm state. If I really want to write I'll remember something that reflects that emotion, for instance the exact moment when I lost my first tooth still makes me smile as those Pete had just accidentally knocked out of my jaw. Writing helps me release and put my memories and emotions to good use. Better than burning Philips Hall or the EPB to the ground. Oh and to all those boys who used to tease me in middle school for being a tomboy, thanks for the inspiration.

Number 2: To remember

My memory has never been fantastic or terrible, mainly average. Still in order to better remember something I write it down be it an address, an idea, or a memory. Over a year ago I started my French blog which dictated every day I spent during my year abroad. It was a bitch to write everyday and I did pay for it when I fell behind, however it was worth it. Looking back at the posts I can actually recall details I would have otherwise forgotten such as the names of Scottish towns I visited with my best friend Kate to the names of people I met along my adventures. Honestly I miss recording my memories but looking back at last semester, well it wasn't full of shining moments for me. Regardless the moments I do write down have seriously significance to me which not only help my writing skill but give me some peace of mind so I don't have to worry about forgetting. Dreams follow along that same path. Now although most of my dreams are nonsensical, many hold a few nuggets of interestingness. An example from a recent dream was the design of a church hall; in this particular chapel if you will there were windows which had various forms of glass, not color just different thicknesses and textures. When you looked out one of the windows a large field of grass and clover filled the view with a smudgy grey sky. The view of this field changed when looking through another window since no two shared the same pattern of glass. Instead of just a world of grey and green you saw a warped plane with gashes and a sky filled with breaks. Simply imperfect. This is what I took from that wacky dream (no details, I like to keep this blog somewhat clean in areas) which is perfect for the temple windows in my novel sketch. Had I not written it down I could've forgotten and honestly windows are important to remember. They let the light in.

Number: 3 I have no idea what else to do

Writing seems to be the only activity I loath and love in perfect equilibrium. It pisses me off immensely when the ink won't flow and when I spent time on something only to scrap it as failure. When I do create something I'm proud of I tend to send to specific people (I have a short list) for opinion who have a few spare moments in their day to read my work. When I'm bored, I write. When I'm busy (right now I'm supposed to be doing French homework before class), I write. When I'm scared, I write. When I'm travelling, I write. When I'm eating (I suggest you not type after eating Cheetos, messy), I write. Really when there's a moment where I dunno what I should do I'm probably writing. It's funny actually, those sentences make it seem as if I'm always using my time productively which is not true. I'll lie on my bed for hours going over details in my head that have nothing to do with anything only to write three words down. The one thing I'm guaranteed to do every day is write something of my own down somewhere. I think one of my strangest moments of this was etching the word "stillness" into a brick at my elementary school. No matter what for that day I wrote. Now if only I was paid a nice large salary to write crap like that I think I'd enjoy my adult life every day.

Well audience that might have been a bit too personal of a blog (less scary than the nightmare one though) for you. If it was fear not the game based posts will continue after this. Guess I wanted to write something a bit different for the gamer post. Hmm I should relate something to video games though, just cause...

Alright here is something, the first story I ever wrote was based in the Zelda universe from Link to the Past. I wrote a short story (at the time it seemed like three volumes since I was about seven) through the viewpoint of Zelda waiting in the sanctuary. Sadly the file is forever lost due the crash of the computer I wrote it on back then. Eh, it was cute, all that matters.

Laterz my audience.

Rareware Interlude

Aight audience this post is not my norm of video game review style. I know I promised you a post relating to the word "deuce" but that one is on hold just for the moment. Fear not it has been drafted and will be completed in uh, well time. Right now I have a burden on my mind that's been eating away steadily since the early 2000's. A brief history before the nostalgia and sadness begin. Going all heavy now. Oh, as always scroll down to the bottom for some music. Happens to be a favorite piece of mine remixed.

Rant Time!

For those of you unfamiliar with Rareware (gramers and n00bs alike) it was a video game development company headquartered in England. Rareware or Rare for short created some of the most renowned games of the first three generations of gaming. Literally it was one success after another. A three generational span of wins. Not too shabby at all from making the leaps between NES, SNES, and N64. To give you some idea of how awesome Rare was here's a few examples of generation leaps.

Thanks to Rare Battletoads exists. That arcade and eventually NES classic is an amazing multiplayer game where you run around as giant mutant toads named Zit, Rash (my choice character), and Pimple beating the crap out of enemies or in battle mode, each other. The color and textures, the creative level design and innovation with pick up weapons and vehicles, not to mention all the interesting bosses made for one sweet game to share with buddies or in my case an older brother.

A few classics followed on the SNES one of which I wrote an entire post about, the Donkey Kong Country Series. No longer the ape who stole Paulina from Mario, DK was recast as a hero who was now after his stolen banana hoard in strange new land of Donkey Kong Island. This game redefined what SNES graphics were capable of bringing forth pre-rendered 3D making for beautiful smooth movements through the ever challenging levels. The two sequels that followed (the 2nd in my eyes being the best of the banana bunch) kept the key principles of secrets, kremling bashing, and barrel exploding action that the first game brought to the world. Rare even threw in Cranky Kong to give some of the 80's kids nostalgia to the original DK arcade games.

Rare, why did you have to die?

My final example of generation awesomeness involves a game I royally suck at. Sure I could mention Conker's Bad Fur Day or Banjo-Kazooie which are two of my favorite adventure games of all time and two prominent Rareware games but that would be expected. Rather I'm bringing forth the game that I watched my big brother play over and over while he performed barrel rolls and allowed Flippy to die in scalding Arwing crashes; it's Star Fox 64.

Although I'm terrible at this game (stupid tank level) I still love it. The Arwing is an amazing vehicle to maneuver around the screen while fighting various minions of the galaxy. Although this game is home to some of the most irritating NPCs it brought a shade of reality that not everyone on your team is going to be kissing your ass the whole way through; I'm looking at you Falco. The amount of secrets, levels, and variability made this N64 classic one players still revisit despite being considered retro by today's standards.

So much goodness until 2002 when Microsoft decided to ruin everything. Rareware was bought out and its franchises divided between Microsoft and Nintendo. Microsoft gained Conker, Banjo, and the Perfect Dark series while Nintendo kept Donkey Kong and Star Fox. Rare was officially gone as the stronghold wingman of Nintendo.

Star Fox wise Nintendo has sucked ass with the series. Crystal really? Even Wolf isn't that strong of a character. With DK Nintendo took a back seat with the legendary ape causing him to appear in party games rather than racing (RIP Donkey Kong Racing) or sidescrollers. Eventually with the Wii Nintendo showed some sense (they've since lost it completely) and released Donkey Kong Country Returns which was a decent game filled with nostalgia, smooth sidescrolling joy, and difficult levels with secrets galore. Now...Microsoft...a word...

There aren't enough swears in every language combined to express my hatred for what you, Microsoft did to Rareware. You destroyed it. Just killed every brilliant part of the company. It's a bad sign when most of the employees refused to make the switch as well as the founding Stamper Brothers leaving you for good after you soul sucked their franchises into becoming B-List games.

Don't look to the right, it burns!

Banjo was turned into a creepy bear only capable of crashing half-assed vehicles into the ground rather than the tag team duo of bird and bear conquering the many obstacles and paintings found in Grunti's lair. Why?

Please, just put the jacket on!

Suddenly Joanna Dark became all boob and NO awesome FPS gun gameplay in the Perfect Dark Zero release. Sure she was hot on the N64 which was fine since she was the female version of James Bond. However on the N64 she actually kicked ass and shot the shit out of her enemies. Bring forth the 360 installment where there's nothing but a cheap version of Lara Croft running around with shitty pistols unaware of enemy fire. Run Joanna, it's all you're good at.

Conker, oh Conker. This might be the saddest tale ever. Rare had a sequel Conker game lined up that involved Conker spending all the kingdom's money on booze which led to him being booted from the throne. That alone sets up the dark and problem riddled world filled with cute animals, bright colors, and swearing left and right that is the Conker franchise. Rather than be sensible, Microsoft decided to reboot the game making Conker into an orange puff ball as well as ripping out the multi-player classics and censoring the game further. Uh what? Since when did the newer generations require more censorship on mature rated games? Seriously? You were supposed to be Live and Uncut instead of Sheltered and Damp. Microsoft, you monster you.

I'm hypocrite of course. I use a PC whom I love dearly (Rikki <3) and am a fan of the 360 and original Xbox console. So really I'm giving Microsoft money each year since I buy their products despite hating them, nay fucking loathing them with every flame of hatred in my body for ruining the company that gave my video game moments in childhood so much happiness and nostalgia. Despite this I still use the product (mainly because I don't enjoy using Macs since being a gamer with a Mac is a major setback). Still I haven't properly stood up against the Rareware crimes of Microsoft.

That changes now. Microsoft wants feedback they'll have it. I've written, commented, and supported groups who want Nintendo to change its ways since the Wii U disaster of E3 2011. Nintendo has received my feedback. It's not much, might not make a difference, but it's doing something. I've finally decided to do the same with Microsoft and Rareware. Since Rare is still owned 100% by Microsoft they are the ones to complain to properly and they are the ones who will consistently receive my feedback. As a gamer in a world of overpriced systems, dying franchises, and failing companies it is somewhat my responsibility to let those who control the games know what's going on.

This was a rant about Rareware. I love you Rare and you'll always be in my systems and on my top charts. I'll do my best to avenge your fall.

Far Longer than Forever

Something to enjoy while reading...

 

My Introduction

Hello there audience. Yes you, the person reading this from behind a screen. Welcome to a sliver of internet known as Some Pixel Dust, a gamer's blog. That is simply what this is; a blog where I write about various video games that I play. Why are you reading it? I don't know, are you bored?

In any case this blog functions as a way for me to write about something that I love. Video games have always been involved in my life going back to my older brother and me playing Mario Kart on his SNES before I could read. Nowadays I primarily play games on my PC and my 360. When home for breaks (college student alert) I do dust off my Nintendo cartridges and indulge in some old school gameplay. Who knows, if I keep up with classes well enough I might be able to bring another system to my apartment as well as a better PC. Time and grades will only tell.

Forewarning, some of the games I'll blog about are not my typical genre. This translate into I'll suck at them massively. As hard as I've tried to become good as FPS titles I just blow ass at them. The only ability I'm somewhat decent at is sniping thanks to Conker's Bad Fur Day; zombie squirrels are a pain in the ass.

The main slew of games that I play are RPGs, MMOs (surprisingly not warcraft), racing, adventure, and strategy. I enjoy solitary gaming but I have to say it's always more fun to co-op. My main co-op buddies are my brother (Sneaky)Pete and my best friends Tim and Brian. Hopefully I can include some recordings of us playing or at least dialogue segments for "memory purposes". To be honest we're not especially clever we're just silly. Sides it's all for the fun of it.

That concludes my introduction to this shiny new blog. I hope some of you will follow it and watch as it becomes a beloved beat up blog with insider jokes and soda stains. Time to press play and growl as the patch update takes forever.

Much (probable) love,

Mare