The LAN post I hinted about in my last blog will be put on hold for a short while. The problem is my dad took down the LAN setup my brother and I made together over the holidays. This is an issue since the LAN post includes pictures of what LANs look like which were/will be silly pictures of my friends and me. So until I can recreate the LAN setting which may take a few weekends the LAN post will be on the back burner.
Still, I wanted to write to you audience because that's something I do. Why? Well that's kinda the title of the post. At least reasons I can think of why I write and what I earn from it. Things may become a bit weirder than normal. You've been warned.
Number 1: To release emotion
I am an emotional person (in fact everyone is emotional just in different ways) who tends to show extreme bursts of emotion rather than small doses. My normal state is just relaxed, not really happy or sad just calm. Apparently this causes a bored look to appear on my face (source, my friends) which isn't exactly true to how I'm feeling; I mean I can feel boredom but when I'm inside my mind I tend to not be showing it on the outside, apparently. So when I do show emotion it tends to be on the more intense spectrum. This covers all my ranges such as anger, sadness, happiness, envy, anxiety, fear, etc. Whenever I feel any of these you will know. I'm not known for being subtle. Often this causes interesting reactions to the environment around me namely people. Obnoxious happy Mary is hyper and often optimistic and very liberal with hugs. On the flip-side depressed frail Mary literally slinks around the room until she finds a comfortable spot on the floor and remains still until sense knocks her in the head. Whatever the emotion, if I am alone or can be for some moments I will write. Sometimes this means writing furiously spilling ink all over the place, decorating my arms with colorful shades of marker, or typing with my eyes closed on Rikki. All of these emotions are useful for writing a story and if I'm feeling one of them strongly then I can write a scene or chapter far better than in my normal calm state. If I really want to write I'll remember something that reflects that emotion, for instance the exact moment when I lost my first tooth still makes me smile as those Pete had just accidentally knocked out of my jaw. Writing helps me release and put my memories and emotions to good use. Better than burning Philips Hall or the EPB to the ground. Oh and to all those boys who used to tease me in middle school for being a tomboy, thanks for the inspiration.
Number 2: To remember
My memory has never been fantastic or terrible, mainly average. Still in order to better remember something I write it down be it an address, an idea, or a memory. Over a year ago I started my French blog which dictated every day I spent during my year abroad. It was a bitch to write everyday and I did pay for it when I fell behind, however it was worth it. Looking back at the posts I can actually recall details I would have otherwise forgotten such as the names of Scottish towns I visited with my best friend Kate to the names of people I met along my adventures. Honestly I miss recording my memories but looking back at last semester, well it wasn't full of shining moments for me. Regardless the moments I do write down have seriously significance to me which not only help my writing skill but give me some peace of mind so I don't have to worry about forgetting. Dreams follow along that same path. Now although most of my dreams are nonsensical, many hold a few nuggets of interestingness. An example from a recent dream was the design of a church hall; in this particular chapel if you will there were windows which had various forms of glass, not color just different thicknesses and textures. When you looked out one of the windows a large field of grass and clover filled the view with a smudgy grey sky. The view of this field changed when looking through another window since no two shared the same pattern of glass. Instead of just a world of grey and green you saw a warped plane with gashes and a sky filled with breaks. Simply imperfect. This is what I took from that wacky dream (no details, I like to keep this blog somewhat clean in areas) which is perfect for the temple windows in my novel sketch. Had I not written it down I could've forgotten and honestly windows are important to remember. They let the light in.
Number: 3 I have no idea what else to do
Writing seems to be the only activity I loath and love in perfect equilibrium. It pisses me off immensely when the ink won't flow and when I spent time on something only to scrap it as failure. When I do create something I'm proud of I tend to send to specific people (I have a short list) for opinion who have a few spare moments in their day to read my work. When I'm bored, I write. When I'm busy (right now I'm supposed to be doing French homework before class), I write. When I'm scared, I write. When I'm travelling, I write. When I'm eating (I suggest you not type after eating Cheetos, messy), I write. Really when there's a moment where I dunno what I should do I'm probably writing. It's funny actually, those sentences make it seem as if I'm always using my time productively which is not true. I'll lie on my bed for hours going over details in my head that have nothing to do with anything only to write three words down. The one thing I'm guaranteed to do every day is write something of my own down somewhere. I think one of my strangest moments of this was etching the word "stillness" into a brick at my elementary school. No matter what for that day I wrote. Now if only I was paid a nice large salary to write crap like that I think I'd enjoy my adult life every day.
Well audience that might have been a bit too personal of a blog (less scary than the nightmare one though) for you. If it was fear not the game based posts will continue after this. Guess I wanted to write something a bit different for the gamer post. Hmm I should relate something to video games though, just cause...
Alright here is something, the first story I ever wrote was based in the Zelda universe from Link to the Past. I wrote a short story (at the time it seemed like three volumes since I was about seven) through the viewpoint of Zelda waiting in the sanctuary. Sadly the file is forever lost due the crash of the computer I wrote it on back then. Eh, it was cute, all that matters.
Laterz my audience.
No comments :
Post a Comment