Plants Vs Zombies, tree of wisdom be damned

Alright technically I wouldn't be posting a blog at this time, I'd be in class. However one of my French professors sent out an email explaining that class was cancelled due to her being sick with a cold. Strange to catch a cold in 100 degree (Fahrenheit of course) weather but alright, no class. So what to do in my free time?

I was awake and functioning (barely functioning) at six in the morning since that is my new sleep cycle schedule. Fear not those who know me I'm simply doing this for school not as a change of personality. Honestly mornings, bleh. The point is I've been up for hours mostly reading and felt I deserved a little academic break. I don't have many one player games on my PC but I have enough to fill in a moment such as this. Today that game was Plants Vs Zombies.

Now for those of you unfamiliar with Plants Vs Zombies here are some quick details about it:

• It is a tower puzzle game produced by PopCap
• You are an unseen suburban resident who defends his home/life from zombies by growing a garden of mutant plants. 
• Each plant has a different function of either defense/offense against zombies
• The zombies differ greatly in their speed, attack power, and health. Some of them even dance!

What I LOVE about this game

The almanac of plants/zombies, Crazy Dave, the various level styles, and the music. 

The plant/zombie almanac is a reference book of useless and interesting facts about zombies and plants. It includes a picture and a little quip about the plant or zombie. I just love reading through this thing since the creators clearly had fun writing it. My two favorites are the Ducky Tuber Zombie and the Ice Shroom. You can see why below. 

Crazy Dave is your neighbor and guide throughout most of the game. He appears about every five levels and owns a shop located in the trunk of his van. He often says ridiculous things, however hidden beneath the crazy there are some decent pointers. At the last level he tries to give you advice but of course he is snatched away before that happens.

Now his shop is very interesting. Not only does it sell new upgraded plants (which are expensive as all hell though completely worth it) but he also has a decent selection of necessary objects used in your Zen Garden. 

The Zen Garden is a place where you can grow plants that simply spit out coins. Of course you need to water the plants, feed them while they're growing, spray them for pests, and play them music all to make them happy. That costs money. However once a large enough Zen Garden is made then actual money is earned. Meaning those upgraded plants can be yours. I'll go into "money making" later in my rant section of this post.

So the levels are standard but change as you progress through the game. I mean if they didn't it would be boring as all hell. At first you're defending your front lawn which is divided into a 5x9 grid. As you complete levels of zombie raids you gain new plants. At first you have very few plants, the basics. However once you're in the third and fourth stages of the game it becomes difficult to decide which to use and which not to. Ah, tricky you are Popcap. My favorite stage type is fog; this where you are defending your backyard (complete with a pool) that is covered by nightfall and a very thick fog. The fog makes the zombies "invisible" meaning you can't see which row they are walking down. Oh crap. I have a lot of fun with these levels because it adds an extra bit of intensity to it all. I was that kid who genuinely enjoyed pin the tail on the donkey. Something bout being in the dark. And possibly blindfolds. Moving on!

So the last BIG love of this game for me is the soundtrack. I could describe the brilliance of the composer or I could have a link to my favorite song in the game. Warning, it's catchy!

Now the two things I cannot fucking stand in this game! 

Money making and the Tree of Wisdom.

I'll start with money since it ties into my hatred of the Tree of Wisdom. So throughout the game you have a cute bouncing garden full of mutant plants that willingly defend your life and home. Awesome! Not awesome is the fact that every item you buy from Crazy Dave in the game is ridiculously expensive for what it does. There are two MAJOR ways of making dough in the game. At first the mini games and puzzles seem like endless piles of cash. Well that's not quite true. As soon as you beat them the prize money for finishing the completed mini game/puzzle drops significantly. It ain't worth the time. So the two ways are really the Zen Garden and Survival Endless.

The Zen Garden really only becomes money-wise worthwhile once it's over halfway full of plants. At that time you can use Stinky the Snail to gather coins for you (after feeding him chocolate which is questionable) for an hour. He earns about 30,000 coins worth in an hour which is significant. Especially since you don't pay for chocolate but rather you find it by playing Survival levels and standard levels. Same goes for finding plants for your Zen Garden. Speaking of Survival,

Survival is an addition to the game where you try to last as many rounds as possible. There is a Survival Endless which as it sounds never ends. This is useful for gathering coins. Once your garden looks like this, you never have to worry about cash ever again.

 You simply have to keep playing until you eventually lose. Popcap was kind enough to include upgraded Magnet Shrooms which collect coins for you. Very useful indeed. Two of them on-screen and there isn't a single coin left out. Thanks for that Popcap it's just the patience of waiting is, well it's boring. Even with that much action going on you adjust to it. So it's either Zen Garden or Survival Endless to earn the coinage. The worst part is you have to be ridiculously wealthy to grow the damn Tree of Wisdom. And here the loathing begins.

So this is the Tree of Wisdom or as I like to call it the overpriced tree of crap.

 The only reason it is worth anything to grow it up to 1,000 feet is to unlock certain codes in the game. For instance if you type flowers (you can see this above in the Endless picture) when zombies die a trail of daisies is left behind. At 1,000 feet you can command the zombies to dance. That's pretty rad. I covet this ability but am very far from reaching it. So I really don't like the Tree of Wisdom, especially since it stops giving you wisdom after a certain point and just tells you to feed it. By the way, the bags of food which cause it to grow a whopping one foot cost 2,500 coins per bag. Sounds low; not really when it takes 25,000 to grow ten feet and 2,500,000 to grow 1,000 feet. Maybe someday when I'm retired I will have made it to 1,000 feet but for now I'm stuck at 350 feet with 1,625,000 coins to go. Well shit.

Should you play Plants Vs Zombies?

Hell yeah you should. This game is amazing addicting fun that both entertains and challenges your defense strategies. You honestly can ignore the damn tree and money; I don't cause I'm a completionist but such is my curse. The variety of plants and zombies is well thought out and enjoyable. The levels and extras as well are fun to complete. Trust me I did cartwheels after besting Pogo Party in the mini games. Fucking evil level! So yes you should give this game a go because it's definitely worth it. 

Also be on the look out for Plants Vs Zombies 2. It's now an app for the Iphone and Ipad. Since I own neither I'm missing out but hey I'm sure it's also sweet.